Journal, Life and Friend

Merry Christmas 2010

Last year, there was someone special who shared a Christmas moment with me. We have so much dreams – our dreams I would say for that very blissful moment. I think, if there is something called as happiness – it has to be that very moment we spend together. Then I found time created different story to tell – she is no longer by my side.

When all dreams shattered in instant, you will have nothing left behind but a simple fact that … you have to walk just by yourself. I know, she wouldn’t be here again even when I need her most. I know how she loves Christmas so much, she used to has a beautiful smile when talking and listening songs about Christmas, and I don’t know how those smiles uniquely encouraged me in many untellable ways, letting go my loneliness and let a warm togetherness enters my heart.

Since she’s no longer in the world where I still stand & breath freely, I don’t know whether she would smile or not in this Christmas. But – yes I know – she would smile like she used to be, bring warm and happiness to every soul who see it. And it would bring peace upon me.

Well, its Christmas now. Miracles and peace should be all around. Don’t worry there is no way you can’t get any, just open your heart – it should be there, right in front of your heart’s door. What would do in Christmas? For me, maybe I would like to listen one of my Christmas favourite song, you might already now this song…

I don’t want a lot for Christmas
There is just one thing I need
I don’t care about the presents
Underneath the Christmas tree

I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
All I want for Christmas is you

I don’t want a lot for Christmas
There is just one thing I need
And I don’t care about the presents
Underneath the Christmas tree

I don’t need to hang my stocking
There upon the fireplace
Santa Claus won’t make me happy
With a toy on Christmas day

I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
All I want for Christmas is you

I won’t ask for much this Christmas
I won’t even wish for snow
And I, I just wanna keep on waiting
Underneath the mistletoe

I won’t make a list and send it
To the North Pole for St. Nick
I won’t even stay awake
To hear those magic reindeer click

Cause I just want you here tonight
Holding onto me so tight
What more can I do
Oh baby, all I want for Christmas is you

All the lights are shining
So brightly everywhere
And the sound of childrens’
Laughter fills the air

And everyone is singing
I hear those sleigh bells ringing
Santa won’t you bring me
The one I really need

Won’t you please bring my baby to me, quickly
I don’t want a lot for Christmas
This is all I’m asking for
I just wanna see my baby

Standing right outside my door
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true

Baby, all I want for Christmas is you
All I want for Christmas is you, baby

Yes, it is “All I want for Christmas is You” a song by Mariah Carey – a singer and songwriter. I love listening this song when Christmas comes. Hope you like it too.

And here is my Christmas’ card that I’ve made it special for all my friends (including my family in Moonlight Mansion) who is celebrating Christmas – wherever you are right now. Merry Christmas to all of you, may be peace upon all of us.

My Christmas Card

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Life and Friend

Won’t Sleep Alone

When the night fall, I can feel the cold breeze is coming down from the mountain’s hill. I can hear you breath close to my chest.  I don’t know how to make a move in a situation just like this one. This heart is beating faster and faster, feeling the warmth of your small body.

I am afraid I make a wrong move, you would fly away from this enchanted room, since your foot prints won’t be uncharted in this floor of solitude. Your soft eyes would charm everyone that look straight at those jewels. I have nothing to over but a simple word with thanks.

Baca lebih lanjut

Joy and Dream, Life and Friend

Ti voglio bene

There was a phrase which started a stormy sea around my ark life. A beautiful words of “Ti voglio bene”. I won’t forget the voice that brought me the words – yet, I think I have ever smiled freely in the first time of my life.

But I think she has wishing me to move on with my life, so I have to move on to a distance right now. Thanks Tion…, thanks Nara…, thanks Yalsi…, thanks Tiara…, you are my best buddies – please take care – I have to go now. The stormy sea awaits me, I can’t bring you all along, please understand. Believe me, you are all already in a good hand, who will take you with care & love.

With this, the Moonarch secret operation ended, accomplished with my full gratitude to all of you.

Ti voglio bene, cara…

Life and Friend

Visiting Sanur Beach

Really, it was just before noon a couple days ago I got a call to visit Sanur Beach together with my old friend from high school and her family. I said yes, and she picked me up about 09.15 a.m. We travelled from Gianyar through Sukawati to reach Eastern Denpasar before Sanur.

The traffic was crowded as how it used to be. It took more than a hour to reach Sanur by 10.20. I must let her down since I denied to join on swimming together – well, I am never been a good swimmer since the whole moment I can remember.

I thought the beach wasn’t so crowded, but the parking lot nearly full. The parking man charge us IDR 5.000,- for single car. And the a couple rest place with a huge umbrella cost IDR 20.000,-. Well, tourism sure an expensive thing even for locals – like us.

They was seem enjoying the calm water of Sanur beach just under the tropical sunshine. Lot of families seems enjoying the beach just before the noon, with  canoes for children – there was a lot of fun in a beach with small waves.

Watching from distance, my friend looked like enjoying herself swimming on the shallow waters. And for me, in a moment, I could find a huge question mark hanging above my head. “How could I be dragged here?”

But since she is my nemesis, I thought I have no right questioning for anything further more. Beside, I just love being sitting around the beach since I was kid, so I felt I would let myself enjoying the beach in my way.

Stared both of my palm, and my mind whispered softly. I has been more than a couple months I’ve let go the ring which used be there. Past has already left far behind, but I don’t know, maybe the essential feeling weren’t vanished at all, but merely sealed within – somewhere deep within me, in the place even my consciousness can’t tell it.

People said that sea can sweep away all our heart’s burdens. But seeing sea, wasn’t make me feel any lighter. No, nothing wrong with the sea nor with the beach. It was and it is me which already been so corrupted inside, it is me that so full of myself which turn tears into invisible winds flew low above the sea and never reach any shore. But, it was me who chose the path of darkness, it was me who chose to walk without a single light.

Yes, I am full of myself, and this path is the very nature of my own act. Just like watching the beach with everything on it.

  Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2010 Cahya Legawa

Journal, Life and Friend

We Love Go to the Field

Who said medical student just sit nicely behind the desk or chattering somewhere around the corner and corridor, or just have to dealt with patients all the days. We do go to the field, where there are maybe some “to do list” that has a minim connection with medical aspect itself.

Here are some photographs of the medical student activities, that you might not seen around hospital, or they has no connection at all with medical fields.

Night work

Above: the night activity when we collecting and analyzing the medical issue of some neighbourhood, and try to formulazing some solutions.

Sudut desa 2: Jalan desa high path

Above: sitting behind a soft chair on a room with AC? Well, you may try to walk around some hills and in the middle of woods to finding any public health issue.

Sungai di Pondokan

Above: if walking all the days made you feel so tired, then why not have a seightseing around what we call nature itself. It just nice to wacth for a stream before continuing to walk around again. You shall not find any luxiory here, but you may find joy, that you will love your duty.

My Dummy

Above: trust me, we do prefer to make our collegeu as a “guinnea pig” than our beloved patients which we respect so much. Practice makes perfect, I don’t know if there were no one willingly become a medical student’s patient in care, so how we would develope a better doctor in future? Medical doctor isn’t like carpenter who need just wood to practice, medical student need a real patient, a real disease, a real problem, a real issue, a real experience which made it a real practice.

Presentasi Kerja 2

Above: we do need to present everything that we found on the field. A chalange to our self and our effort for a better understanding of medical field itself.


So, are interesting in entering medical field? Its not so boring at all.

Life and Friend

A Priceless Baby

They who have been stayed long enough at “Wisma Cahaya Rembulan” should be knew the “Baby”. She is a priceless cute baby from the next yard, and she used to play around our veranda if she has a time.

She really hates cats, always yelling loudly when a cat passing by. But she now getting old, just like me. Even so, we still call her, “Baby”, ha ha…, what a cute one.


Then we said, “we love you BabyHot smile

  Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2010 Cahya Legawa

Life and Friend

When I found you

Lets see, do you still remember when the first time we met? How I found you inside those dusky brushwood. Your face was exited by the new light over the clouds above us. Yes, it was a fantastic hour beneath the celestial wind that faith bring upon us. Yes, that breath, that face, that look, that eyes, everything was not so clear today. But I knew that was sure not mere soft feeling that would easy flew away. Hmm…, it was nice to meet you back there :). Happy weekend everyone!

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